Do you guys really design your toys after real dogs?

Yep. But rescued dogs only. Keep in mind that in addition to the rescues that we're all familiar with, it also includes any dog that has had human intervention to save their life in some way. That could mean a dog bought from a breeder who suddenly develops a life-threatening ailment; if that dog is saved from euthanasia by a human and treated, that qualifies as a rescue to us. Another example would be a dog who was saved from drowning.

Dogs simply purchased from a breeder do not qualify. We care about dogs in jeopardy. Where they come from, it doesn't matter.

Why can't you make more plushies of more dogs?

We're privately funded. Plus side is that we have total control. Down side is we can't make many. Super down side is we must have "Complaints of the Month" instead of FAQs.

Why do we have to wait so long for new plushies to come out?

Laziness mostly. Designers working too close to their own fridges. Staff tantrums. Generally, we seem to attract delicate flowers who like to get paid to watch clouds. Management is usually stunned when a new plushie does come out, we always have to ask the designers if they're okay.

What is your mission exactly?

It's a simple one. To introduce the next generation to the idea of rescuing a dog as opposed to purchasing one. If they own a stuffie as a child that has a real story of rescue attached to it, they will grow up familiar with rescuing. Then, hopefully, rescue a dog in the future. The contest we hold is another way we hopefully inspire rescuing.

I see your dolls are made overseas. Aren't you ashamed of not being made in the USA?

Oh most defintely. Back in 2016 we prepared the staff to abandon everything that was made overseas, so we confiscated everyone's smart phone, air fresheners, office chairs, office vending machines, microwaves and the toasters, told them they had to use paper and pencils instead of computers, and took all the Green Tea from the lunch room. The entire staff quit the same day except for Dominic the janitor, but only because we got him a really expensive mop from Amish country. So we returned it all and are back to just being ashamed. Dominic is now our HR manager and we've returned to feeling insecure about ourselves and the future of commerce.

Why do your plushies all have the same body?

That's actually our fault. The head design and the body design are always separate drawings. And the factory keeps using the same damn drawing we gave them in 2016 no matter how much we yell over the phone.

Can you make my rescued cat as a Pibborafi?

No.

My pet snake, Reggie?

Definitely no.

I have a bird.

Close your browser, now.

Do you really help abandoned dogs in shelters or is that a marketing gimmick?

Yes. That is, we supply Pibborafi Rescue plushes to shelters and rescues for free so they can sell or auction them off and keep 100% of the profits for treating abandoned and abused dogs. We also donate a portion of proceeds of some plushies to rescues and shelters. If you want to call that a gimmick then yes, we gimmick the hell out of it.

How do I get my rescue into your Pibborafi Rescue Hero Contest?

Check our Instagram page for the latest updates on when the instructions appear. Best to follow us and you won't miss them.

You know what, it's just better to donate directly to shelters. Nobody has to buy your dumb dolls.

We like your thinking. Email your resume to us here, please. Include a cover letter.

I'm considering applying for a creative job with you but, if you'll forgive this question; I'd like to know how many staff members have quit your company?

You're forgiven. And, all of them. It's just me right now. Let me have your resume. Are you good with picking up dry cleaning, and deferred paychecks until 2026? Please say yes, we have no other applicants smart enough to have asked that question.

Can I just get my own Pibborafi Plushie done and not wait for you to "select" me?

Yes! It's a program called Secret Celebrity: It opens up the possibility for a rescue owner to commission our studio to design their pup guaranteed with no bother with selections. Beaux Tox was the first. However, the rules are extremely strict. And a bit of a waiting list for this program. It would actually be easier, cheaper, and take us less time to help you land a seat on the next SpaceX flight to Mars. Email us for details (on landing the Secret Celebrity, not the flight to Mars).

What if my dog is a really good seller for you, can I get some profits please?

No.
Just kidding.
Yes! If you're a Contest winner, you can participate in Pibborafi Unlimited where once your pup reaches past a certain sales threshold, you get a portion of profits! We'll send you an invitation to participate once your pup gets to that threshold. A nice easy way to do no work and get money.

What's the sales threshold for Pibborafi Unlimited?

Only those approaching it are told that. It's not as high as you think.

Would you guys ever buy a social media platform and rename it with a single letter? What would the letter be?

Yes. And "Y" Mostly because reading that letter aloud is the whiny sound we would hear people making—and we love whiny people, just look at the rest of these questions.

I was one of those dog owners that was on your huge waiting list to get my dog done a few years back. I got an email from you saying I had to post pictures of my dog now on Instagram to enter your Contest? Am I still on a list to get my dog done?

Yes you are. The list got crazy cuz it was so easy to just enter a name. We sent out a notice to everyone that to be considered now, you must submit a picture on our Instagram to enter our Contest. Yep you, and everyone else, is still considered but we encourage all of you to post on Instagram and get in the Contest, your odds on getting chosen will be much, much, much higher.

I would like to buy a Pibborafi but why do you charge so much for shipping to other countries?

We don't control international shipping costs. Our best solution for you is to move to the United States — how hard can that be, right? Let us know when you're here!

It's a neat idea. But you're not the only ones who make toys after people's pets.

Consider us the lottery of the recreated-doggie-in-plush business. That means you enter your dog into our Contest, if your dog wins a category, you get your doggie-in-plush free with free shipping to your home. If your pup is popular, you get profit sharing. For everyone else, all of our shameful creations go for less than twenty bucks.

Really? It looks like you decide on what toy dogs to make, then just wait until someone sends in pics that match, right?

That's so scandalous we might start doing that to live up to your question. Sadly, we actually do choose the dogs from Instagram submissions. But fingers crossed, we may one day measure up to your expectations and in which case, celebrate with cake. Not for you. For us.

Why do you do what you do?

A great question!
Finally.
Take a look into the eyes of almost any animal. What do you see? We see innocent souls that need to be held close and rescued from harm. Dogs are especially important to us and through the funds we can funnel through animal rescues and shelter organizations, we are privileged to help all animals from Great Danes to squirrels and everything in between. The toys are simply a means to that end.

Nothing you guys do is consistent. Do you even know what your brand is about?

What's your point?

Why were your early dolls so much bigger than your current dolls?

Because. They were.

How long can you hold your breath?

We believe this is a question for accounting. This is customer service.

When did Pibborafi get founded?

January 2016.

Was your founder really an ex-dog walker?

If he wasn't, he lied.

Are there any perks for working for your company? And please don't say free dolls.

Sure. We have a 12-step anger-management program that many are taking advantage of. We have installed cameras in the parking garage so we can minimize break-ins to your cars, and we've gotten rid of "that smell" in the lobby (you're welcome). We also have a gym in the building that no one is allowed to use because it's not owned by us—but it's there, so as far as management's concerned, it counts.

Will you ever do a pop-up store?

F**k no. Never. No way. Forget it.
Well, ok. If there's food involved. The kind that gets bought for us.

As a guy I don't collect stuffed animals but if I did, I don't think yours look very good.

That's perfectly all right, sir. It's your opinion. Hold on, your kindergarten teacher's on the line, she wants to apologize for ignoring you in favor of all the other kids back then. Oh, wait. She's changed her mind. Nope, she's good. Never mind.

You guys are too bitter to be making toys.

That seems more of a comment than a question. Please submit to the comment section. FYI: we have no comment section.

What is wrong with you people?

We can't name employees or have you contact them because of privacy laws, but you're probably referring to employees like Stephan Hargrove (his email shargroveinthehouze@gmail.com), or maybe Jonathan Tandy (his email drtandy1107@gmail.com), who are in need of very intensive counselling. So, in their case the answer to your question is in fact; "Not sure where to begin."